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PATH: BS | Society | Stupid People

Humans Have Reached The Pinnacle Of Evolution Posted by Pile (9953 views) [E-Mail link]	[Your 15m]
Maryland computer programmer, John Winter Smith has a noble goal. No he's not working on decoding the human genome, designing a secure operating system, or creating flawless voice recognition. John Smith's goal: to visit every Starbucks Coffee store in the world. So far he's bought coffee at more than 4,500 stores of the chain in North America and more than 200 overseas. What a coincedence. My noble goal has been to walk into every Starbucks and scream, "What the F*** is wrong with you people?!?"
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Burrito Incites School and Law Enforcement Into Action Posted by Pile (5321 views) [E-Mail link]
A call about a possible weapon at a middle school prompted police to put armed officers on rooftops, close nearby streets and lock down the school. After seeing a boy carrying something long and wrapped into Marshall Junior High, authorities lept into action. The drama ended two hours later when the suspicious item was identified as a 30-inch burrito filled with steak, guacamole, lettuce, salsa and jalapenos and wrapped inside tin foil and a white T-shirt. I feel safer already.
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Church Group Recommends "Naked Nanny" Posted by Pile (5147 views) [E-Mail link]
To many in the Old Northeast neighborhood where Sarah Slicker lived and babysat, she was a Mary Poppins-like figure with a brilliant smile, bubbly disposition and a natural ability with children. Slicker began babysitting at age 12. She taught Bible classes, helped with Sunday school and worked in the nursery at First United Methodist Church. Her church awarded her a college scholarship and she graduated from Florida Southern College with a degree in pre-K education. Everything seemed peachy except that odd incident when she was babysitting a 4-year-old boy, who demanded she take off her clothes, whereupon she complied, and let him touch her. Oops.
READ MORE \| 1 comment since 2005-06-26 16:14:57 \| Comment on this Article

Republicans Sue Each Other Over Infringement of Letter "W" Posted by Pile (7500 views) [E-Mail link]
A supporter of President Bush is suing the Republican National Committee and one of its suppliers, claiming they stole his design for the ubiquitous "W" bumper sticker logo in the 2004 campaign.
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Moonie's Paper Claims Oil Is Endless Resource Posted by Pile (8268 views) [E-Mail link]	[Dubious Research]
Reverend Sun Young Moon, owner of the Washington times and self-proclaimed reincarnation of Christ has published an interesting editorial in his paper that speculates that oil does not come from organic matter, but deep inside the earth and is a virtually unlimited resource.
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Woman Calls 911 Over a Cheeseburger Posted by Pile (6590 views) [E-Mail link]
In the If-I-didn't-know-some-people-were-really-stupid-I'd-think-this-was-an-April-Fool's-Joke department, comes a California airhead who parks her car in the drive-thru of Burger King, orders a product that is sold by Carl's Jr. and then calls 911 when they won't make her a Western BBQ Burger. Now I'm beginning to understand where poll results come from.
READ MORE \| 14 comments since 2006-01-16 06:33:05 \| Comment on this Article

50 Peeps, 60 Minutes, One Moron, Still No Cure For Cancer Posted by Pile (9964 views) [E-Mail link]	[Junk Food]
In honor of Easter, and this bizarre associated manufacturing of demand for candied forest critters comes Carl Huber, an otherwise nondescript youngster with net access, bad judgement and an obsessive desire to have his fifteen minutes of fame. Congrats.
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E-Scrabble Site Owner Gets Cease-And-Desist From Hasbro Posted by Pile (4802 views) [E-Mail link]
Normally, we're not the most corporation-friendly bunch of guys on the web. We think the little guy gets shafted way too often by big corporations, but in this case, a guy who has been running a site called E-SCRABBLE.COM, which is obviously, an online version of Hasbro's Scrabble(tm) game, was suddenly surprised that he got a cease-and-desist letter from Hasbro's lawyers. I think this blows the idea out of the water that all computer programmers are "smart."
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Treasury Dept Socially Engineers IRS Employees Posted by Pile (5728 views) [E-Mail link]
How safe are your government records? It turns out not very. Treasury Department auditors called 100 IRS employees and managers, portraying themselves as personnel from the information technology help desk trying to correct a network problem. They asked the employees to provide their network logon name and temporarily change their password to one they suggested. 35% complied. The good news [sic] is that this is better than 75% of the IRS employees that fell for the ruse in 2001.
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Spimmer Gets Busted By Company He Thinks He's Contracting With Posted by Pile (4642 views) [E-Mail link]	[Technology]
An 18-year old from New York was arrested last Wednesday when he discovered a way to send unsolicited messages to peoples' personal information managers (called "Spimming" because someone apparently thinks we don't have enough goofy names for various procedures). He sent out "spam" messages to people threatening to publicize the technique unless an exclusive marketing deal was signed with him, legitimizing his activity. Of course, when he flew to California to "legitimize the deal", he found a legitimate pair of handcuffs waiting for him.
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Paris Hilton's Phone Account Hacked (again) Posted by Pile (6715 views) [E-Mail link]
This might come as a shock to many, but Paris Hilton isn't the smartest cookie in the jar, yet she has an impressive array of friends, all of whom have repeatedly had to endure problems when it comes to maintaining the integrity of their personal phone numbers when this blonde bimbo gets her plethora of PIMs hacked and broken into. The latest scandal reveals an array of naked self-portraits from her new camera phone, personal notes and a hefty list of private phone numbers of the rich and famous. Actually, what's sad about this, is that this is not really Paris Hilton's fault. I wonder if the FBI will look into the bad security that T-Mobile and Sidekick seem to have? UPDATE: Now includes a story on how her account was hacked.. this is classic.
READ MORE \| 11 comments since 2009-11-26 23:26:12 \| Comment on this Article

Louisiana Man Pleads Guilty to Launching WebTV 911 Worm Posted by Pile (5563 views) [E-Mail link]
The United States Attorney's Office for the Northern District of California announced that, roughly a year after his arrest, David Jeansonne pleaded guilty Tuesday to two criminal counts in a scheme that sent email to users of Microsoft's WebTV Internet service containing an attachment that, when opened, reprogrammed their computers to dial 9-1-1 without their knowledge. It still unclear what motivated this 43-year-old to launch such a bizarre worm, then again, we are talking Louisiana.
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Welshman Cuts Balls Off to Celebrate Soccer Win Posted by wizeGurl (5265 views) [E-Mail link]
A Welsh soccer fan promised his friends that if Wales beat England in the Six Nations Tournament, he'd cut his own balls off.
READ MORE \| 5 comments since 2005-04-19 18:39:55 \| Comment on this Article

Internet Explorer exploits released into the wild - no fix yet Posted by Pile (7993 views) [E-Mail link]
I have to assume most are not foolish enough to still be running Internet Explorer as their browser when there are more secure alternatives, but just in case, be prepared to have your computer compromised as there are more vulnerabilities that even fully-patched Windows XP-SP2 can't stop.
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MTV's Real World heads to Austin Posted by Pile (7843 views) [E-Mail link]	[Television]
While many probably didn't realize it was still ont he air, the grand-daddy of reality TV shows, MTV's "Real World" heads to Austin, Texas for it's 16th season. The producers of this season's show promise that the Austin locale will showcase even more unique real estate, unique new drinks which unique new whiny teens will drink too much of, and unique new ways in which to toss your cookies and act like babies.
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Anti-seatbelt advocate dies due to not wearing seat belt Posted by Pile (5074 views) [E-Mail link]
A Nebraska student, known for being an advocate against the mandatory seat belt laws, died early Tuesday morning when the Ford Explorer he was a passenger in travelled off an icy section of Interstate 80 and rolled several times in a ditch. Kieper, who was riding in the back seat of the Explorer, was ejected from the vehicle.
READ MORE \| 1 comment since 2005-01-10 12:44:27 \| Comment on this Article

Canadian bids $20k for Texas snowball on eBay Posted by Pile (5238 views) [E-Mail link]
Granted, this is likely a hoax and nobody in their right mind will do this, or maybe it's yet another goofy publicity stunt, but moron #1 has has put a snowball up for auction on eBay and moron #2 had put a $20k bid on said snowball. Now, since moron #2 is from Canada, I can understand why he might be so interested in a texan snowball -- he likely doesn't get much of that stuff in his neck of the woods and one from Texas... well that's just a bonus. Update: It seems the $20k Canadian bid was retracted and the item went for $92.00. Either way, the end is near.
READ MORE \| 1 comment since 2005-01-08 22:47:31 \| Comment on this Article

$52,000 truffle purchased, then left to rot Posted by Pile (5231 views) [E-Mail link]
A London restauranteur paid $52,000 for what some claim is the world's largest truffle, then he locked it in a refrigerator and it went bad.
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Fox news writer spins tragedy into corporate PR Posted by Pile (5697 views) [E-Mail link]	[News Media]
Steven Milloy, the self-proclaimed critic of junk science at Fox News, rarely misses an opportunity to bash environmentalists. Following the terrorist attacks of September 11, he falsely claimed that the collapse of the World Trade Towers could have been delayed if only the builders had used more asbestos. He also has a habit of distorting other people's words when it serves his agenda. (A recent example of this was featured on RealClimate.org, a weblog for climate scientists.)
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British Surfer Claims that He Rode the Tsunami Posted by wizeGurl (8745 views) [E-Mail link]	[So-They-Say]
You say horrific tragedy that kills vast numbers of people...he says "Hang ten!"
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Ohio couple pay $85 to reserve Christmas church pew Posted by Pile (4492 views) [E-Mail link]
Joe and Kathy Tricaso weren't taking any chances on not getting a seat for Mass on Christmas Eve. The couple, who live in the Akron suburb of Green, spent $85 in a church auction last summer to reserve a pew.
READ MORE \| 1 comment since 2005-01-01 17:01:04 \| Comment on this Article

Road rage flash cards! Posted by Pile (8108 views) [E-Mail link]
For the passive-aggressive crazy in us all comes the neat invention of Road Rage Flash Cards. If you're cut off, tired of idiots talking on their cell phones, and generally bad drivers, you can whip out these easy-to-select flash cards to give them a piece of your mind. Kevlar vest and health insurance sold separately.
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Our Lady of the George Foreman Grill Posted by wizeGurl (4866 views) [E-Mail link]
Going fast, but not cheap, on Ebay right now--it's a miracle--it's the image of the Virgin Mary in a grilled cheese sandwich. And miracle of miracles, although the sandwich is 10 years old, it's not even rotten! Surely you want this icon of holiness in YOUR refrigerator!
READ MORE \| 3 comments since 2004-11-17 10:26:47 \| Comment on this Article

Man tries to convert lions to Christianity Posted by Pile (4510 views) [E-Mail link]
�Jesus will save you!� shouted the 46-year-old man at two African lions lounging under a tree a few meters away. �Come bite me!� he said with both hands raised, television footage showed.
READ MORE \| 1 comment since 2004-11-05 11:36:02 \| Comment on this Article

It's now official: Ralph Nader is insane Posted by Pile (6389 views) [E-Mail link]
Ralph Nader is now selling a DVD of himself debating minature dolls representing Kerry and Bush. Apparently his rejection from the Presidential debates has finally pushed him over the deep end. Using the actual questions from the Presidential debates, Ralph discusses his plans for pulling our troops out of Iraq, solutions for the energy crisis, is Ken having an affair with G.I. Joe, and what's with that stuck up biatch Barbie.
READ MORE \| 6 comments since 2005-09-28 15:09:43 \| Comment on this Article

Bush's One-fingered Victory Salute Posted by wizeGurl (5367 views) [E-Mail link]
See then-Governor George W. Bush playfully give an aid (presumably Karen Hughes) a preview of what he has in store for the country.
READ MORE \| 1 comment since 2004-10-29 17:23:37 \| Comment on this Article

Tucker Carlson: hurting America, hurting Bambi Posted by wizeGurl (7849 views) [E-Mail link]	[Television]
From the Washington Post: First Tucker Carlson was dissed by Jon Stewart. Now, is nature turning against him, too? Early yesterday morning, Carlson was snoozing in the back of a town car, returning from a debate with his CNN "Crossfire" co-host Paul Begala at Moravian College in Bethlehem, Pa. Two deer darted onto Interstate 95 south of Baltimore. The driver avoided one but collided with the other, setting off the air bag and rendering the car undrivable.
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Ex-Gays Tell Cheneys it's a choice Posted by wizeGurl (4281 views) [E-Mail link]
Remember how upset Lynne and Dick Cheney got when Kerry mentioned their daughter's being a lesbian? How upset do you think they will be by this open letter to them, mentioning it again, and offering them the advice that Mary can be cured?
READ MORE \| 1 comment since 2004-10-27 10:21:13 \| Comment on this Article

Alan Keyes on Adoptees and Incest Posted by wizeGurl (4502 views) [E-Mail link]
U.S. Republican candidate for Senate and total right-wing nutball Alan Keyes said Saturday that children raised by gay couples faced "inevitable" incest because they might not know who their siblings are. Said Keyes, "If we do not know who the mother is, who the father is, without knowing all the brothers and sisters, incest becomes inevitable."
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No more 9/11 commemorative silver dollars? Posted by Pile (4669 views) [E-Mail link]
We reported on this before, the schmucks who were marketing the 9/11 commemmorative coins, supposedly made from silver mined from the ruins of the world trade center. Apparently the losers pulling this scheme are under investigation. Personally, I think anybody stupid enough to pay $20 for a non-currency "silver dollar" should also be investigated.
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Dick Cheney is a dangerous nutcase! Posted by Psychocktail (5665 views) [E-Mail link]
When John Edwards retaliated to Dick Cheney's attack on his voting record during the vice-presidential debate, one of the things he mentioned was that Cheney voted against a motion calling for the release of Nelson Mandela from prison in South Africa. A lot of people were going 'what?'. 'He did that?' The truth is the man is a wretched extremist incompetent...
READ MORE \| 1 comment since 2014-06-19 13:00:35 \| Comment on this Article

Mel Gibson turns his back on his loyal fans Posted by RantMaster (5361 views) [E-Mail link]	[Entertainment]
Zack Sinclaire, a 34-year old homeless man wants to pray with Mel Gibson. Is that so wrong? Apparently to Mr. Gibson it is, as he's gotten a restraining order.
READ MORE \| 1 comment since 2004-10-01 23:55:50 \| Comment on this Article

Alan Keyes in lesbian scandal! Posted by Psychocktail (5194 views) [E-Mail link]
*Alan Keyes hates gays so much, he's even lashed out at Dick Cheney's lesbian daughter, Mary as a 'selfish hedonist.'* Alan Keyes, the Bible-bashing lunatic from Maryland who is contesting a Senate seat in Illinois, is doing a 'Jimmy Swaggart'. Reports on Keyes inflammatory statements can be found here and here But does this self-righteousness hide a dark secret'?
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Jimmy Swaggart in gay sex scandal! Posted by Psychocktail (12538 views) [E-Mail link]
Christian role model Jimmy Swaggart is NOT gay, OK? Just in case anyone thinks that tawdry televangelist, Jimmy Swaggart, has turned gay, because he has not been caught with a hooker at a sleazy motel for several years is WRONG! OK? You sneering cynics want proof? Well here it is! So there! The devil might have made him do it in the past, but these days he lies with, er, Jesus, the Lamb of God, in the, uh, 'Pastures of Valedictory Virtue' or something. But not like that! SWAGFACT: The great man loves low-fat banana-flavored frozen yoghurt! I know, because in 1988, I asked the 'man' who worked behind the counter at the Zak's Frozen Yoghurt store right next to Swaggart HQ in Baton Rouge what the good reverend's favorite flavour was. "Banana!" he replied, without a slightest hesitation! Praise be!
READ MORE \| 2 comments since 2013-12-25 01:44:06 \| Comment on this Article

Soldier attacked at concert by fans testing the limits of irony Posted by Pile (4146 views) [E-Mail link]
19-year old Foster Barton of Ohio, a decorated veteran was in town attending a Toby Keith concert when he was attacked and beaten by other concertgoers. He claims his t-shirt which said "Iraqi Freedom" may have incited the crowd of trailer park intellectuals who normally attend such cerebral Toby Keith performances. More rich irony goodness. Then again, if you ask me, anyone who actually pays to see Toby Keith deserves a beating.
READ MORE \| 2 comments since 2004-09-30 16:30:43 \| Comment on this Article

David Vitter twitters on 'socialist' England! Posted by Psychocktail (4149 views) [E-Mail link]
"David Vitter says his conservative views didn't really take hold until he left the United States in the mid-80s," according to a front page article in today's Times Picayune, New Orleans' daily newspaper. Vitter is the Republican candidate to replace retiring US Senator, John Breaux in Louisiana. And the foreign horrors which turned Vitter into the hard-boiled conservative he is today?....
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Uh oh.... God is pissed Posted by Pile (4210 views) [E-Mail link]
YAIG (Yet Another Internet Goofball) has come up with an interesting diagram which he claims proves that the recent hurricanes that ravaged the Gulf coast are a message from God to Republican voters. Of course, the bonehead that came up with this didn't count on Snopes to spend ten seconds to research the false nature of the claim. Of course, I think a better sign would be lightning strikes on Fox News, Diebold and Clear Channel.
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RNC Delegates Bad Tippers Posted by wizeGurl (4313 views) [E-Mail link]
It's hard to believe, but apparently the Republican Convention delegates are lousy tippers. Haven't they heard about how trickle-down economics work? Don't they know that they got those huge tax cuts specifically so they could afford to spread around a few dollars to the poor slobs working service jobs without health care benefits?
READ MORE \| 2 comments since 2008-08-18 19:52:50 \| Comment on this Article

God delivers Republican gospel singer from bisexuality! Posted by Psychocktail (4363 views) [E-Mail link]
"I was involved at one time in bisexuality, but it was God that delivered me from that." Donnie McClurkin, Republican Gospel singer performing before President Bush's acceptance speech. More *'Compassionate Conservatism'* here!
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New child discipline: "Hot Saucing?" Posted by Pile (9240 views) [E-Mail link]	[Psychology]
Apparently there's a "hot" debate going on regarding the use of hot sauce to punish children. Is it just me, or is this the stupidest thing you've ever heard of? I don't have an issue with the punitive aspect of disciplining children, but hot sauce? Has, "Go get me the belt!" been replaced with, "Go get me the Tabasco?"
READ MORE \| 5 comments since 2008-08-18 05:53:03 \| Comment on this Article

Google reveals irresponsible customers & merchants Posted by Pile (5757 views) [E-Mail link]
There's a buzz going around the tech community of an interesting demonstration of Google's ability to ferret credit card numbers from the web. Generally-speaking, the Fair Credit Billing Act of 1976 protects American consumers against fradulent activity, but it never ceases to amaze me how stupid customers and stupid merchants put sensitive information in public Internet space.
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Mich. Teens Set TV Viewing World Record Posted by RantMaster (7599 views) [E-Mail link]	[Television]
Two teens in Grand Rapids have set the new standard for America's young, by watching 52 hours of consecutive television and are awaiting verification of a new world record... and a year's supply of rice-a-roni.
READ MORE \| 3 comments since 2004-08-23 13:31:04 \| Comment on this Article

Lawyer claims to own the sun and wants to charge for its energy Posted by Admin (9821 views) [E-Mail link]	[Astronomy]
In an effort to expose people like Dennis Hope of the "Lunar Embassy" who apparently has been selling people parcels of moon real estate, Scotsman Virgiliu Pop has upped the ante, claiming ownership of the sun. In February 2001, Mr. Nemitz sent NASA an invoice for the parking/storage fee for the NEAR Shoemaker spacecraft, that landed on 'his' property.
READ MORE \| 1 comment since 2004-08-15 00:54:53 \| Comment on this Article

Boston pizzaria owner stages protest because DNC hires caterers Posted by Admin (4641 views) [E-Mail link]
It seems the owner of a pizza shop across from the convention center where the Democratic National Convention will be held, is upset that the convention will be serving its own meals to the delegates. As a result, the restaurant owner has decided to put up a "Go Bush" banner across the street and close down his store and go play golf in Canada during the convention.
READ MORE \| 1 comment since 2004-07-23 18:33:54 \| Comment on this Article

Killer phone numbers in Nigeria Posted by Admin (4760 views) [E-Mail link]
Apparently, people in Nigeria are believing a goofy story that answering certain calls on ones cell phone will result in death.
READ MORE \| 1 comment since 2004-07-23 18:17:26 \| Comment on this Article

Running of the Bulls in Pamplona, Spain Posted by notthefirsttime (4176 views) [E-Mail link]
How much of a "thrill" seeking idiot do you have to be to put yourself in this situation?
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Kiwi amateur rocket scientist blows his top Posted by Admin (4209 views) [E-Mail link]	[Science]
Amateur missile builder Bruce Simpson, fed up with his government's foolish attempt to restrict their citizens from trying to create cruise missiles in their backyards, has decided to go freelance and offer his services to the highest bidder. I'm sure nobody else on the planet will be bothered by this and he'll be free to continue his work, which he says is necessary to support his family.
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