PATH: BS | Apocalyptic Signs

British Woman Weds Israeli Dolphin

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[Pets]
Speaking of animal lovers, a British woman on vacation at an Israeli resort met a handsome dolphin named Cindy. (Yes, the dolphin does appear to be male despite the name.) Naturally, it was love at first sight. And as we all know, love leads inevitably to marriage. After 15 years of making regular trips to visit her aquatic mammalian squeeze, she finally made an honest dolphin of him.

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Christian Video Game Allows Players to Smite If They Have Faith

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Catechumen is a first person action/adventure Christian game where your goal is to defeat the forces of evil, descending deeper into the depths of the Earth and rescue your captured brethren.

Kind of ironic that smiting people causes your faith to drain and you need more faith to go on to more smiting.

No word if the level bosses are ACLU members, PETA, Democrats or Activist Judges.

READ MORE | 2 comments since 2005-12-30 15:15:08 | Comment on this Article

More Evidence Of Man's Influence In Global Climate

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[Environment]
Scientists working with Antarctic ice have found that the level of greenhouse gases is at the highest level in over half a million years. Carbon dioxide is 27% higher now than any other time over the last 650 000 years. Methane, an even stronger greenhouse gas is 130% higher. The period of time studied covers eight full glacial cycles including a time when the earth's position relative to the sun is the same as it is today. Other scientists have found that the annual rate at which the sea has risen since the industrial revolution is twice that of over the last 5000 years. It is predicted that by 2100 the sea level will be 40cm higher. These results provide strong evidence that human activity since the industrial revolution, rather than just natural processes, has strongly altered the world's climate. As one of the scientists involved in the research put it: 'The levels of primary greenhouse gases such as methane, carbon dioxide and nitrous oxide are up dramatically since the Industrial Revolution, at a speed and magnitude that the Earth has not seen in hundreds of thousands of years.'"

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Bush: God Told Me To Invade Iraq

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George Bush has claimed he was on a mission from God when he launched the invasions of Afghanistan and Iraq, according to a senior Palestinian politician in an interview to be broadcast by the BBC later this month.

Mr Bush revealed the extent of his religious fervour when he met a Palestinian delegation during the Israeli-Palestinian summit at the Egpytian resort of Sharm el-Sheikh, four months after the US-led invasion of Iraq in 2003.

READ MORE | 1 comment since 2005-10-07 03:14:38 | Comment on this Article

President's Vacation Not a Total Loss

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[Humor]
It's good to see that when tragedy strikes, there are still people with great Photoshop skills there to comment. Truly, a picture is worth a thousand words, even if it's a made-up picture.

READ MORE | 3 comments since 2005-09-17 15:35:03 | Comment on this Article

Pam Anderson Tackled by Turtle Surfing Doggie Wedding Crasher

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From the, "I wish I could make this kind of stuff up" department, comes the bizarre real life story (with pictures) of a nutty guy who surfs up to the beach on a giant inflatable turtle and tackles Pamela Anderson to the ground while she's hosting a wedding for her dogs.

Please let's have a moment of silence for what may be the best headline ever.

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Wine bottles with a new twist

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Something screwy is happening in the wine world. Increasingly, the sound of a cork being popped out of a wine bottle is being replaced by the crackle of a screw cap being undone.

READ MORE | 1 comment since 2005-08-18 21:36:26 | Comment on this Article

Camp Bush does it again ---more on 'evil judges'

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Once again, the Bush Administration is busy trying to change laws while we're not paying attention.

READ MORE | 2 comments since 2005-09-14 01:47:00 | Comment on this Article

Mel Gibson Asked To Stage Crucifiction of Christ

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Actor-director Mel Gibson has been asked to recreate the crucifixion of Jesus Christ in the streets of Sydney if the city is selected to host a major Catholic gathering in 2008, a newspaper reported.

Gibson's staging of the Stations of the Cross, a live interpretation of Christ's final hours, would be part of a bid by the city to secure the Catholic Church's World Youth Day in 2008, the Sydney Morning Herald reported Saturday.

READ MORE | 2 comments since 2005-08-14 18:40:22 | Comment on this Article

Russia's Biggest Spammer Brutally Murdered

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[Spam]
Vardan Kushnir, notorious for sending spam to each and every citizen of Russia who appeared to have an e-mail, was found dead in his Moscow apartment on Sunday, Interfax reported Monday. He died after suffering repeated blows to the head.

READ MORE | 1 comment since 2005-08-02 21:19:38 | Comment on this Article

450 Sheep Commit Suicide in Turkey

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[Sociology]
First one sheep jumped to its death. Then stunned Turkish shepherds, who had left the herd to graze while they had breakfast, watched as nearly 1,500 others followed, each leaping off the same cliff, Turkish media reported.

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Boffins Create Zombie Dogs!

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[Dubious Research]
SCIENTISTS have created eerie zombie dogs, reanimating the canines after several hours of clinical death in attempts to develop suspended animation for humans.

READ MORE | 4 comments since 2005-12-27 11:02:55 | Comment on this Article

Cute Outfits for your Penis

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If you find that ordinary boxers or g-strings shaped like elephants aren't jazzy enough, you can relax...the good people at Durex Condoms have created "dickorations."

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Salem Revisited in the UK: Fundy Christian Human Sacrifices

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A shocking report from London's Scotland Yard claims that some fundamentalist Christian sects in the country have been caught performing torture and human sacrifices. Young African boys are bought and sold and brought into the country to particpate in murderous rituals perpetrated by extremist Christian sects.

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Study Shows Having Cats May Alter Peoples' Brain

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They may look like lovable pets but Britain’s estimated 9m domestic cats are being blamed by scientists for infecting up to half the population with a parasite that can alter people’s personalities.

The startling figures emerge from studies into toxoplasma gondii, a parasite carried by almost all the country’s feline population. They show that half of Britain’s human population carry the parasite in their brains, and that infected people may undergo slow but crucial changes in their behaviour.

READ MORE | 5 comments since 2006-01-16 06:23:34 | Comment on this Article

Star Wars Merchandising Hits All Time Low

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Do you reminisce about that sexy scene in Star Wars where Princess Leia was kidnapped by Jabba and dressed as a slave, but you wish you could re-create the imagery with your dog? Well, apparently you aren't alone and the dawn to your dark days has arrived! Announcing the Princess Leia Slave Girl Dog Costume! It's just one of the many great new Star Wars-related products to be regurgitated onto the market in time to capitalize on George Lucas' latest solicitation.

READ MORE | 8 comments since 2007-07-09 06:16:08 | Comment on this Article

Craigslist Goes Intergalactic... Uh Oh!

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[Viral Marketing]
Craigslist CEO Jim Buckmaster won an auction on eBay for the first private communication to be transmitted into deep space. As a result, on March 5th, they transmitted 138,000 classified ads into outer space.

If you've ever browsed Craigslist, it's a frightening thought that this San Francisco-based classified ad company might have broadcast a thousand messages about circumcision, used mattresses, and bad dating experiences into space. It's bad enough that aliens might intercept errant tv transmissions of "Friends" or "CNN Crossfire", but Craigslist? Am I the only one who now believes Earth's invasion by Jerry Springer-esque aliens is inevitable?

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Virgin Mary Shows Up Under Chicago Highway

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Hundreds of people are now flocking to a Chicago expressway underpass to view a salt stain some say looks like the virgin Mary. Doesn't it seem more likely if the image was legit it would be Lot's wife?

It's nice to know that God thinks the world is in such great shape he has time to manifest "miracles" of this nature.

READ MORE | 6 comments since 2005-06-18 20:21:03 | Comment on this Article

Mow Your Lawn Or You'll Be Sorry

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[Lonely People]
What happens when you have an uber uptight, landscaping nazi in your suburban neighborhood and she learns how to create her own web site?

READ MORE | 3 comments since 2005-04-21 20:38:26 | Comment on this Article

Woman Calls 911 Over a Cheeseburger

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In the If-I-didn't-know-some-people-were-really-stupid-I'd-think-this-was-an-April-Fool's-Joke department, comes a California airhead who parks her car in the drive-thru of Burger King, orders a product that is sold by Carl's Jr. and then calls 911 when they won't make her a Western BBQ Burger.

Now I'm beginning to understand where poll results come from.

READ MORE | 14 comments since 2006-01-16 06:33:05 | Comment on this Article

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